Fancy Pants

I'm putting on my fancy pants—

They’re special as can be!

Oh no one else has pants that are

Quite like the ones on me!

My fancy pants are purple,

My fancy pants have stripes.

My pants have lots more buttons

Than the plain non-fancy types.

The buttons go right down the front.

I counted them—there’s eight!

They button in a row, and so

The closing part stays straight.

The pocket flaps are upside-down—

They’re just for decoration.

But still, I love my fancy pants!

A fashion celebration!

I’m just a bit confused, though,

By the big hole for my bottom.

It seems to have a collar, too.

I wonder why it’s got ’em?

I’ll go and ask my friend next door—

I guess it couldn’t hurt.

I just adore my fancy pants!

Has someone seen my shirt?