Come closer, my boy, and I’ll tell you a tale
To make your bones shiver and shout.
A dozen brave men journeyed into the woods,
And not one among them came out!
Some say they got lost on a poorly marked trail,
Some say that an animal got ’em.
Some say that they wandered too close to the cliff
And plummeted down to the bottom.
And some say they met up with Johnny Hook Hands,
Or Bob with the bear traps for feet.
Or Sad Sticky Steve with the Super-Glue fingers
From whom there’s no hope of retreat.
But some say the story is creepier still—
They say they were snatched by the trees.
And sometimes, my boy, if you listen real close,
You still hear their screams on the breeze.
We may never know what became of those men.
Oh theirs is a sad tale of woe.
But sure as you’re born, we won’t see them again—
They left twenty minutes ago!