Stuffed

I got some mashed potatoes

And I crammed them up inside.

A dozen stewed tomatoes

And a walnut, lightly fried.

Some jelly beans, a bar of soap,

A tiny rubber chicken,

Four chunks of moldy cantaloupe 

All ready for the stickin’.

I shoved in half a sticky bun

(It’s just a little chewed),

Some chocolate chips and, just for fun,

My “Super Action Dude™”!

A can of cola, black-eyed peas,

The rest of my burrito,

Some raisin bran, my grandpa’s keys,

My record-setting Cheeto.

I tossed in some beef jerky,

Then I slammed the oven shut.

They said to stuff the turkey,

But they never said with what!