Excuse me, sir, to help my school
I'm selling magazines.
The perfect chance to show support
For all the local teens.
I brought this giant catalog
For just a short review.
Let's find the best selection here
Especially for you.
We’ve got the standards, TOME and Newswonk,
We’ve still got Poople, TV God,
And Living Ancient Greekly.
There’s Frog Aficionado,
Or Toad Monthly if you please.
There’s Crockpot Illustrated
And What’s New in Beaver Cheese.
Are you a sports enthusiast?
Check out Cats Playing Cricket.
Try Storage Closet Monthly—
It can tell you where to stick it.
If you’re a frequent traveler,
Then you’ll love Tour Nebraska,
The chef in you will cherish
Weekly Ways to Bake Alaska.
And, if you’re feeling naughty,
There's a special new selection:
The Whoopie Cushion Quarterly
To add to your collection.
Subscribe to any that you like,
'Cause helping schools is nice!
I'll put you down for three or four
At twice the cover price.
I'll take a check or credit card.
It's fine, I've got all day.
Or, if you give me twenty cash,
I might just go away!