Oh no one on earth is as gallant or grand
As Door-to-Door Dan with the Super-Sized Hand.
This salesman walks boldly from castle to shack,
Approaches the front door and gives it a whack.
The thunderous clap from his mountainous fist
Rings up to the heavens and cannot be missed!
As strong as an elephant, equally wide,
Dan’s mighty right hand calls the people inside.
They shudder in fear, but soon run to the door
To greet him before he can knock anymore.
Before they can squeak out the tiniest word,
Like “My, you’re surprisingly well-manicured!”
Dan crackles his knuckles, his fingers all twitch,
And swiftly and smoothly he starts up his pitch.
Dan lives like an emperor hawking his wares--
His patented line of front doorway repairs.