I hope that I can make you laugh.
It is my deepest wish
To swiftly split your sides in half
Where you're most tickle-ish.
To make you chuckle, chortle, snort
And cackle in your glee,
Guffawing 'til your breath is short
In merriment of me.
But if I should amuse you not,
--Of tea, I'm not your cup--
Just gather all the cash you've got
And pay me to shut up.